We can have lunch on the veranda, or perhaps take a cruise to the Islands and sip a martini on the beach. These aren't my pickup lines, but if they were, I'd either get laid a lot or be sitting in a kitchen with Chris Hanson, confused and ashamed. Because the only girls that would fall for these most likely have trouble purchasing a bottle of NyQuil from the pharmacy without a parent present. I wonder if guys realize that a lie is only fool proof if the girl's a fool. It's funny how someone can spend their entire life making minimum wage, driving an aged, partially disassembled vehicle and sleep within the vicinity of their parents home, yet manage to score a gorgeous blond with huge seemingly inflatable tits.
It's complicated:
Lies can be lethal as well as pleasurable. I'm sure you can try to convince every girl you sleep with that the length of your pinkie is 8 inches, but what will you do when it fails? What if amongst the innocent sluts you pick from the litter of drunk, consumer friendly attention whores you find a bright crayon of intuition and know-how? A penny for your thought? How about a dollar for your excuse? Try sleeping through that nightmare.
It's important to remember:
I've always found lies to be the foundation of any good relationship, within a certain set of limitations of course. You can't have your cake, eat it, regurgitate it, and sell it back to the bakery. Can you? I suggest we all be honest for the first 5 minutes of every conversation we ever have with a human being of the opposite sex (animal and fake plant talkers feel free to victimize your pets/inanimate objects with lies of your sexual prowess and career achievements).
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